I am a food snob. It has to be fresh, spicy, and interesting. I will never eat bologna. But there is one foodstuff that I love despite its pedestrian roots — the hamburger. It takes a lot of work to cook one the right way. Regular meat, corn flakes, eggs, worcester sauce, and finely diced onions. The paddies have to formed perfectly, and you must use a charcoal grill. After that, the fun part, and the reason a hamburger is one of great foods of the world — the condiments. Mushrooms, 5 year cheddar, romaine lettuce, chili sauce, bacon, mayonnaise, mustard, carrot flakes, eggs, tomatoes, pineapple, those cheap processed cheese slices, fresh onions, cilantro, homemade yellow relish, or pickles. Hey, you can even put some black forest ham on there, whatever. The tao of hamburger is a “whatever you want” atop an expertly created base.

I’ve had a lot of great hamburgers before, but here are some of the more notable hamburger experiences in my life.

Moss Burger in Tokyo

There is a lot of great burger restaurants in Japan. They actually do the whole American Casual restaurant thing quite well, but one thing that Japan has is awesome hamburger restaurants. In some respects, they make better hamburgers than the Americans. This burger gap must be closed, lest we fall behind.

In and Out burger in San Francisco after walking the Golden Gate Bridge

Visiting my sister in San Francisco, I walked from Fisherman’s Wharf to Marin County, and THEN BACK ACROSS THE BRIDGE AGAIN. With no food. There was some incident with a homeless man who smashed a bus window while yelling incoherently, which made my sister regret listening to me when I convinced her not to take a taxi. Short story shorter, In and Burgers rule even when there are eaten on a hotel room’s desk.

Burgers I cooked on a charcoal grill at my house

You can’t say you appreciate food until you can make it yourself. I was good at making hamburgers, but the charcoal grill caused the occasional time related problem. It was worth it in the end.

VJ’s late night burger under the urban skies of Winnipeg

There was little burger place in my hometown of Winnipeg that served great hamburgers. There was no room to sit inside the building, but there were tables outside. They put chili sauce in the burger, something I haven’t seen replicated anywhere else. Regional variations add to the hamburger mythos.

Arch Deluxe during a burger run to Brandon, Manitoba

I loved that Arch Deluxe that McDonald’s had. There’s not many fans of it out there. Oh, and a burger run? I lived in a small town where the nearest fast food restaurant was an hour’s drive away. When we started getting cars and driver’s licenses in high school, one thing to do to kill time was to drive to the fast food places, go to a Burger King, and then eat the food while driving back.

Burger at Schmeker’s in Winnipeg after Korean vacation

I had spent a bit under a month in Korea, eating nothing but bebimbap, kimchi, and 알몬드. The hamburger at this crazy restaurant called Schemeker’s was perfect, as it contained all of the food I’d been denying myself. I know I could have eaten at McDonald’s while I was there, but I was a bit snobbish at the time. The house-cut french fries were the one thing that made it a notable experience.

The Hamburgers That My Grandmother Cooked

My favorite memory of Grandma are the dinners I had with her and Grandma when I was working at a local convenience store. The walk was less than a block, and the food was always prepared with great care. The main course were hamburgers, To this day I cannot duplicate and cook them myself (I think there’s ketchup in there). There was always lemon-aid and scalloped potatoes. Vegetables, of course. At the end, there was always desert capped with a nod to our British heritage in the Djarling tea with cream. There was left over dainties from her many social engagements, and my favorite, specially prepared flour-free muffins with home made icing on top. When I starting cooking in college, my first foray into baking was remaking those muffins from a recipe that she gave me over the phone. Thanks Grandma!

I’ve seen two Olympic torch relays in my life. The first one was for the Calgary Winter Olympics in 1988. I remember it being very cold. I remember the cheap plastic cups and candles they gave us to share the flame amongst the crowd. I carefully took the burning candle home, and I still have that original flame burning to this day. It is very hard to keep a flame burning for 20 years, but my love for the ideals behind the Olympics is very strong. I usually buy cases of long lasting candles from Costco. Once, the flame almost died in 1999 when two tires were slashed on my car and I couldn’t get to a store in time to purchase candles. I ran, with the dying flame supplanted by left over birthday cake candles, to a 99 cent store. My own personal relay! Ha. Ha. I made it, and the flame is beside me right now.

The hardest part was getting the flame from Canada to Hong Kong. I ended up shipping the flame via fed-ex in a mosquito coil contraption that I set up. I had phoned the now defunct Oasis airlines if I could bring a flame on board, but they said it couldn’t be done. Those Olympic hating jerks! This is all a lot of work that must be done every day, but I love Olympic Torch Relays more than you do.

The second relay? It was for the Beijing 2008 Olympics. The Relay in Hong Kong was going to be ran right next to the apartment I’m staying at. I filmed the whole thing, edited the footage, and threw it on youtube. Enjoy!

Hong Kong Olympic Torch Relay Wan Chai From Rooftop